Hollow

Tonight I learned a lesson

A lesson I devised

It doesn’t make me smarter

It doesn’t make me wise

But awareness is the word I sought

In what tonight I was taught

 

I am a stubborn human

Who likes to hold her own

And to rely on someone else

Just makes me feel ungrown

 

I fight the fight

In constant search

of total independence

And yet I can’t seem to find

The proper simple elements

That join together to

Allow me to get through

That phase…

 

I no longer know

The path I follow

I no longer know

The me who’s hollow

 

Okay, it’s not that bad

I say

Because it’s only me

That may

Make it happen

Make it right

And follow

What fills the hollow

 

So here I go

And where it takes me again

I don’t know

But one thing that I do

I to myself I must be true

No matter what

Stubborn, weak or strong

I will trudge and struggle along

Until the day

When I will stay

Where I belong

 

Where that is I do not know

But I will follow

Until that day that fills the hollow.

 

by Bullimiaddict on Tuesday, December 7, 2010 at 12:22am

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2 thoughts on “Hollow

  1. Thank you for that. I have felt that way, still do, and-

    http://www.wisdomcommons.org
    We are social creatures to the inmost centre of our being. The notion that one can begin anything at all from scratch, free from the past, or unindebted to others, could not conceivably be more wrong. -Karl Popper

  2. Abigail (www.wisdomcommons.org) Your quote on this site is lovely. You can never let go of the past, but you can learn from it and move forward. Most often your past makes you who you are, but you cannot be a slave to it. This, my friend, is often a problem many deal with. Being a slave to their past, rather then taking it to the curb (garbage). I like to believe I am NOT a victim, but someone who has experienced some great times, some challenging times, and some times that are not what I thought life was suppose to be back when I was three or five, or seven. I miss that little girl that had amazing dreams of the future sometimes, but I also love this aging lady who knows that you will always have to take baby steps. No matter your age. To keep moving forward.

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